- "My ex is crazy." In most cases not true. He is most likely the crazy one.
- If he’s over 18 and not in school and doesn’t work or have a car (and isn’t trying to either) he’s a bum and is most likely looking for someone to monetarily provide for him
- If you do date someone who has a child (which I don’t recommend) but if it does happen be VERY cautious if you NEVER hear him speak about his children, spending time with them, see him with them..etc… he most likely aint shit and will talk about his child’s mother being crazy (which jumps back to my first point)… especially if he has more than one with different women….RUN (he doesn’t like to use condoms and if you get pregnant it will be a YOU problem)
- Guys who spend money on things he wants instead of needs…. and when he needs something you have to pay for it (like dudes who have weed but no money to eat)
- Guys who ask for nudes or talk anything sexual within the first few conversations without invitation
- Guys who put down other women. Like the guy who doesn’t like dark skinned women or talks shit about women who wear weave but doesn’t date women with natural hair…
- Guys with the “Lady in the streets but a freak in the sheets” mentality. Normally are against anything pro-women…
- If he already within a first few conversations is jealous or angry towards the idea of you talking to other guys.
So many other things but it’s 5am and I can’t think…
Most of this list sums up my college dating experience
Anybody who says “I would never let my girl (insert thing an adult should have the freedom to decide whether or not to do here)”
if they try to separate you from the people you care about
if you have a suspicion that they’re insecure about any of your accomplishments
if he says “females” instead of “women”, “ladies” or even “girls”
the first time you hear him refer to a woman as a “bitch”, “thot”, “ho”, etc and he can’t reasonably explain how that term applies, just has some throwaway answer…she probably rejected him in the past or has her own mind. He’ll be calling you that after he does something shitty enough for you to leave.
if he tries to control the things you do or own (pets , vacations etc) without actually making any commitment to you.
(this ones connected to my fist one) if he tries to make you give up or abandon something for his love example “would you give up your dog for me?” (was actually asked of me in a very sweetheart, romantic big eyed tone)
if he’s so “busy”.
if he only seems to call you around for sex.
if he is constantly trying to pressure you into sexual acts you have previously told him makes you uncomfortable.
if he tries to make you feel insecure or foolish for enjoying the things you enjoy.
if he only seems to care about you, or becomes jealous the second you begin another relationship.
(and this sorta goes without saying) has no problem dating someone much much younger than him, or taking advantage of teenagers.
There is one thing that truly fills me with rage; when people refer to Amy Winehouse as “a train wreck”, “A bad role model” or worse “just a junkie”.
Yes, she was eccentric, she was bold, she used drugs, she was open about her eating disorders and her behavior was boozy, messy and chaotic. She was damn rock star. She walked about in blood-soaked ballet flats, her beehive held high.
From Jagger, to Jimmi Hendrix, to Kurt Cobain, to Iggy Pop, to Lou Reed, male stars have used drugs, turned up on-stage drunk or high, got into fights, trashed hotel rooms, had ill-considered, public love-affairs, and made a great deal of chaos. Yet rarely has a female rock star indulged in this trend of chaotic living, 'messiness' of this sort has routinely spelt career death for any starlet!
She was intelligent, self aware and a non conformist. She belted out her poetic lyrics with the strength and passion of a woman five times her size. Her lyrics were raw, honest and compelling. 'Rehab' ends with a confession that brings an unexpected, raw emotion to anyone who's ever tried to self-medicate for depression:
They said, I just think you’re depressed
I said, yeah, baby, and the rest…
It’s not just my pride
It’s just till these tears have dried.
She was emotionally anarchic, self-destructive and an unashamed. She had personal demons and issues and she was open, honest and public about them.
Thinking any less of her because of her struggles, is simply an appalling disservice to not only Winehouse, but anyone who has lived/lives with addiction or mental health issues.
*After being called cassius clay at the weigh ins.*
"My name is Muhammad Ali and you will announce it right there in the center of that ring after the fight, if you don’t do it now. I will punish you!"
Ali bloodied Terrell and almost knocked him out in the eighth round, Ali taunted Terrell throughout the match hitting him with sharp jabs and shouting between punches, “What’s my name?” ”What’s my name?” “Say It!” Terrell couldn’t defend himself anymore. All he could do was put his gloves up to his face, both eyes were cut, his left eye was completely closed by the end of the eighth round. The right eye was closing. But The fight still lasted 15 rounds.You know why it lasted 15 rounds? That’s how long Ali wanted it to last. He wanted to punish terrell. He wanted to tell the world what his name was.
In the 12th round Terrell finally said Muhammad Ali.
Just so we’re all clear.
…18 pieces of advice for a younger generation :
what month comes after september???
after that, at 61 days, is the longest month of the year, christmas
THAT THEY’RE NOT TRYING
BECAUSE HOW THE FUCK WOULD YOU KNOW IF THEY’RE TRYING OR NOT
JUST BECAUSE IT DOESN’T LIVE UP TO YOUR STANDARDS DOESN’T MEAN THEY’RE NOT TRYING
"I was asked to do a show with the emerging African nations. At that time, I was wearing me hair straightened. I wasn’t comfortable in the woman’s skin wearing that style of hair because I knew that they didn’t wear their hair straightened in Africa. So, I went through rehearsals with the straightened hair but the night before the show, which was being done live, I went to a barbershop in Harlem called The Shalamar where Duke Ellington used to cut his hair.
I told the barber to cut my hair as close to my scalp as possible, then shampoo it so it could go back to its natural state. He then sat down. When he regained himself, he came back to me and said, ‘Are you sure that’s what you want?’ I said, ‘Yes.’
The next morning I go to the studio with my hair wrapped in a scarf. I go to makeup and costume. Then when the director said, ‘Places.’ I took the scarf off…You could hear a hair hit the floor. So finally he walked up to me and said, ‘Cicely, you cut your hair…” I sheepishly held my down and shook my head. Then he said, ‘You know, I wanted to ask you to do that but I didn’t have the nerve. [smiles]
Then there was George C. Scott who asked my agent to send me in to meet with them for East Side/West Side. I said ‘Well, what do I do about my hair?’ They said, ‘Your hair? Leave it that way.’ And that is what created the natural hair craze. That show and my wearing it that way. I got letters from hair dressers all over the country telling me that I was affecting their business because their clients were having their hair cut off so they could wear it like the girl on television.
The cornrow in Sounder, I knew during that period that women in the South cornrowed the head. So, I said that [her character] Rebeca would wear her hair in that manner. But everytime I changed the hair it had not to do with me, it had to do with authenticating the character that I was playing.”
—Cicely Tyson, Oprah’s Master Class
Literally me. All these sleepless nights and stressful mornings will pay off.